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Raising kids is difficult, and perhaps we can all agree that what makes it harder is that there is no clear-cut way of doing it. But there’s one way that parents can feel more at ease: Identifying what parenting style matches their and their child’s personalities.
What is your parenting style?
Every family is different with unique needs. So, it’s best to adopt a parenting style that suits your personality and goals. Here are some questions that might help identify what kind of parent you are.
1. Do you set rules that should be followed with no questions asked?
If your answer is yes, you might be employing strict parenting. While it’s not bad to be strict, this type of parenting can instill fear and have negative effects on a child, especially if you use punishment as discipline.
Punishment as discipline may include scolding your child with harsh words, yelling and shouting at him, making him feel guilty, shaming, and spanking him. Several studies have linked this type of harsh parenting to a person’s bad and aggressive behavior growing up.
2. Do you often ‘rescue’ your child and do things for them even if they’re old enough to do it on their own?
If your answer is yes, you might be overparenting, also called helicopter parenting. It is when you are overprotective of your kids to the point that you do everything for them, because you are scared that they will get hurt. In the long run, they will fail to learn the simplest tasks, which can hold them back from achieving their full potential.
ADVERTISEMENT – CONTINUE READING BELOWWhile helicopter parents are affectionate, they are also too lenient when it comes to discipline. This can make a child grow up immature, with little self-control, or worse, entitled.
Remember that kids thrive on rules and routine, so let them explore within limits and don’t feel guilty about disciplining and giving out consequences when misbehavior happens.
3. Do you have a long-term plan on how you want to raise your kids?
This is a mark of intentional parenting, and it often starts with writing down the qualities and values you want your children to have. When you figure that out, you’ll know what to teach your kids so that they grow up with the qualities you envisioned for them.
Intentional parents are proactive instead of reactive, and they mold their kids instead of just correcting misbehavior. They are warm and have an open line of communication with their kids, providing a safe space for tough conversations. The goal is to create a safe, stable, and nurturing relationship with your child by being involved parents.
4. Do you believe in gentle guidance when raising your kids?
Parents who strive to balance being warm and being strict aspire to be panda parents. This new trend in parenting “combines both hard and soft techniques for a perfect ratio of cuddliness and claw,” according to Esther Wojcicki, author of How to Raise Successful People and who came up with the term.
Panda parents sit back and let their kids do what they want, but they also safeguard them with rules. They employ five key traits: Trust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration, and Kindness (TRICK).
CONTINUE READING BELOWRecommended VideosThey love their kids, but they also don’t hover or become overprotective. They believe failure allows kids to develop grit and become more resilient.
5. Are you a parent first, but also a friend when your child needs you to be one?
If your answer is yes, you may be employing authoritative parenting, which experts believe is the healthiest and most effective parenting style. It is a blend of strict parenting and permissive parenting.
According to Nancy Darling, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at Oberlin College, “Authoritative parents teach and guide their children. Their goal is to socialize their children, so they come to accept and value what the parents value.”
She adds, “They tend to adjust their expectations to the needs of the child. They listen to children’s arguments, although they may not change their minds. They persuade and explain, as well as punish.”
Authoritative parents know when to be firm and warm, with high expectations, but they also know how to be collaborative and listen to their children. They are parents first but can also become the friend that their child can turn to for advice.
Help us spread the word on collaborative parenting! Smart Parenting has teamed up with Lady’s Choice for the #DoItTogether Movement that provides moms and kids with co-creation activities they can do together. These routines, chores crafts, and more develop self-sufficiency, positivity, adaptability, connection, and empathy in your child!
To do co-creation activities, visit bit.ly/lcdoittogether. For more collaborative parenting content, visit the hub: bit.ly/doittogetherhub
ADVERTISEMENT – CONTINUE READING BELOWAre your kids growing up entitled? You might be using this parenting style. Click here to read more.
QUIZ: These 5 Questions Will Reveal What Type Of Parent You Are
Source: Progress Pinas
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